It was only a matter of time that all his previous records were jammed down the Memory Hole and the Olympic-level cognitive dissonance took over.
Where once Mitt Romney was the liberalest liberal who ever powered his Prius with aborted babies and burning copies of the Constitution, now, thanks to the Power of Retard we will soon see poorly-executed photoshops of Romney being carried aloft by a smiling Washington and Lincoln on a sedan chair made of Crying Eagles as an F-150 monster truck jumps over the scene with Jesus and Reagan in the back high-fiving while forcing Hilary Clinton’s face into a bucket marked “Arab Buttholes.”
Meanwhile the guy down the street who has inadvertently aerated his lawn by changing yard signs from Ron Paul to Michelle Bachmann to Sarah Palin to Herman Cain back to Michelle Bachmann to Newt Gingrich to Rick Santorum will, at last, put up his Romney sign and tell everyone he’s backed Mitt from day one.
~Anonymous internet forum user “Mr. Coffee Nerves” on fark.com